Life With Depression: First Major Crash

To understand my first major crash after moving back to Canada and realizing my mistake with my daughter I need to take you back in time a little bit to give some background information.

Growing Up With My Step Dad and Mom

My mom and my stepdad provided very well for me growing up. I wasn’t abused, I was given everything that I needed, and was raised quite well by them. However, in some ways, they weren’t there for me. By that I mean emotionally. Read More

girl holding a box for moving

Life With Depression: Moving Back To Canada

My depression only continued to get worse. After my third cry for help, I had decided that if no one else cared why should I? I finally gave up caring.

At that point, I decided that I would take the core of who I was and partition it in a deep corner of my mind and walled it up.

I figured that I wouldn’t let the depression taint and completely destroy the essence of who I was. This helped me to protect myself as I finally let the depression run rampant through my body. Read More

Green Tea and Vitamin B12 For Depression Experiment Results

In my post, Green Tea and Vitamin B12 for Depression Experiment, I gave some background to how the experiment came to be and outlined the experiment. 

In this post, I will be discussing the results of my experiment after giving it a try for one month. I was only able to drink the green tea twice a day. As mentioned in the experiment post the optimal consumption of green tea is four times a day.

However, even at the two cups a day I was able to see some results. From the results, I have had I hope to increase the green tea consumption to three or four cups a day and see if it helps more.  Read More

hand coming out of water with help written on it

Life With Depression: Third Cry for Help

I can’t say for other mental illnesses, but with depression, it completely changes who you are. You find that with a mental illness you are no longer the same person. It seems to strip away everything you used to be and fill you with this incredible sadness. On top of that, you have the lack of energy, motivation, and desire to do things. The depression brings with it a sense of death. Death to life, to happiness and to things you used to enjoy doing.

After my second cry for help, I was starting to feel that no one cared. If no one cared about me, why should I care? However, there was still something in me that wanted to fight. To this day this small light that wants to fight back is there. For me I find it to be an annoying part of myself. Read More

woman with head in hands depressed

A Look Inside The Mind When Feeling Suicidal

I have been keeping my blog posts to once a week, however, I thought this would be a good opportunity to add to my story and help create some awareness into the life with depression and suicide.

woman with arm out and hand full of pills on the floorThe Depression Hit Hard and Suicide Became an Option

Last night my depression hit hard. I am in a constant state of depression so I get used to having it there. However, it hit harder than it has in a while and brought me to the doorstep of attempting suicide with the door wide open. Read More

Outline of man reaching out his hand

Life With Depression: Second Cry for Help

Listen to this blog post:

In the beginning, depression can be easy to spot in a person. They haven’t learned how to hide it. You learn very quickly, though, that people don’t want to be around someone who is sad and depressed all the time. This causes you to learn very quickly how to hide it.

I can’t speak to light and moderate forms of depression, but for severe depression, no matter how good you get at hiding it, there are still signs there if you know what to look for. Read More

guy sitting on a wall depressed

Life With Depression: Onset of the Depression

Listen to this blog:

The Depression Started

Depression, the silent killer. My story has been similar, yet also very different from so many people that suffer from depression as a mental illness.

Everyone’s story will always be different and it can be hard to say that someone has it worse than another because everyone deals with it and copes with it differently.

In this series of stories, I hope to outline my journey with Chronic Severe Treatment-Resistant Depression and Anxiety. Read More